BELLA COUNIHAN February 11, 2010


As the sun rose over the jungle a quiet stirring was to be found. In a clearing, a gathering of young animals waited patiently for the king of the jungle, Kevin the Lion, to arrive. Kevin was only minutes away from greeting the animals of the jungle, his heart was pounding but he strode through the undergrowth confident. "I remember last time", thought Kevin the Lion, "where I was held up by that baboon guy while the circle of life played in the background. Zebras, elephants, rhinos - all the animals of the jungle bowed down before me and I was crowned King. I'm sure this next meeting with the animals will go just as smoothly."

But Kevin the Lion was in for a rude surprise. The jungle animals, especially the young ones who had supported him when he took over the jungle, were not happy with the way he was running the place. The young animals in particular were worried and were ready to take Kevin to task. The lion strode up to the clearing unaware of what was to come.
The first question came from a lame duck who hobbled up and asked about Kevin's campaign slogan. Kevin looked squarely at the duck and ate him up. That was the end of that. But there were more serious questions - "How can we trust you?" asked one little bear. "You haven't done anything you said you would, what about the high road toll for us animals? There's more and more of us getting squished and turned into road kill all the time!"
Kevin the lion was taken aback. He was not prepared for these kinds of confronting questions. He felt the eyes of all the other animals watching and beads of sweat ran down his fur. In the trees, tweeting parrots laughed at the whole scene and thought the animals' silly questions were very amusing. One parrot chirped how bored he was of the meeting and flew off to watch something else.
The rest of the animals continued to squeak and squawk out scary questions for Kevin. He tried to answer the best he could but he was nervous - this was definitely not like last time. Then a penguin rushed up; "what are you going to do about the climate in this jungle? Its getting warmer all the time and most of us can't hack it. You need to change it right away!" One little piglet squealed that he did not believe it was getting warmer in the jungle but he could not be heard among all the snarls and hooting and hollering. The animals were getting into a frenzy. Tony the fox sat in the undergrowth and smiled a knowing smile as he watched the chaos. "Now everyone will forget that I run around with that red-faced baboon Barnaby," he thought.
The animals continued to cluck and neigh and howl. "We're not satisfied with your answers!" bellowed a moose. "You're all talk and no action," gobbled a turkey.
"Calm down!" roared Kevin the Lion. Then he purred, "I'm only one little Lion and I'm doing my best! You guys are just ganging up on me for the sake of it. Most of you don't even live in this jungle. You, the Indian elephant, have you always lived in this jungle?"
"Oooooh!" went the crowd. "You're an animalist!" they cried. "You think some animals are more equal than others!"
"No, I don't", said the Lion, "I just want to know if everybody here lives within my kingdom then I can answer your questions properly." But the Lion could not be heard, his pleas were drowned out by bleats, buzzes and braying of all sorts. The animals whipped themselves up into such hysteria that they ran out of the jungle and rampaged across the valley leaving only a cloud of dust behind them.
The lion breathed a sigh of relief, the tumultuous meeting was over. Kevin the Lion went back into the jungle with his tail between his legs. "I should have heeded the warning", said the Lion to himself, "never work with children or animals."

Bella Counihan is The Goanna.